My youngest son who is 16 years old asked me if he could smoke a cigar with me. Normally, I would say NO but he is really interested in all the fascets of cigar smoking. My other son who is 21 is a cigar smoker. I would love to share the moment of his first cigar and I really do not want him to experiment on the street. In the past I have let my children drink some wine with dinner, is this any different?

Why not... I don't see how waiting 2 years will change his mind considering the significant interest displayed. I think it better to be involved in his cigar smoking if he truly is interested. Most important is to identify the "bad" side of using tobacco products and some of the differences among them. This might help so that he doesn't assume that smoking cigarettes doesn't carry a significantly worse health risk than cigars.

I smoked cigars at 16, since people in my family did. Just teach him how to be responsible and it'll be fine. Jumnro would know better than me about the differences in health risks with different products, but I was taught moderation at a young age and it has worked out for me.

No, 16 is not old enough to decide something with health implications like cigars, however minor you might deem them. There are certain choices that are for adults.

quote:

Originally posted by Stratocaster:
No, 16 is not old enough to decide something with health implications like cigars, however minor you might deem them. There are certain choices that are for adults.

well i think it is Gino here that is making the choice.

quote:

Originally posted by Stratocaster:
No, 16 is not old enough to decide something with health implications like cigars, however minor you might deem them. There are certain choices that are for adults.

Of course you can have your point of view and I really don't like to argue, but I must ask you something. Do you think drinking has health implications? If so, are those health implications different for a 21 year old American than a 16 year old German? I believe that we have to have all these regulations because kids don't learn moderation in this country. So, I think that as long as Gino teaches his son moderation everything will be ok.

Really though your opinion is perfectly ok; I'm certainly not trying to be mean in any way. The last thing I want to do it fight with people on a message board .

I have 4 children and I have always taught my kids to come to me if they want to try something, No drugs are acceptable. I always wanted my children to come to me about sex, alcohol, etc. My elderest daughter is in the 3rd year at Stanford pursuing Medical School and my other two children are attending the U. Of Miami. I am going to give him a cigar next week and make it a special father son moment.

I think the last thing anyone should do for their children is take a strict prohibitive stance on alcohol and tobacco... Looks like the great Catholic church in their infinite wisdom and preaching abstinence has worked perfectly.

Unfortunately, Americans hate educating their young, and thus we reap the benefits of the least educated population in the "developed" world.

I'm 21. My parents always told me that smoking is wrong. That is because that is how they are. I figured out on my own the difference between all types of tobacco. Now I educate them. Though they are still not thrilled with my new hobby.

but to answer the question. I would definitely sit down and have a chat. A common interest between father and son can save a relationship. plus, what better way to have a talk than smoking together.

Well, this is really not an answer to your question, but I will tell you that one of the greatest pleasures I enjoy is to have a cigar with my sons and sons in law. A flyfishing trip to Colorado a couple of years ago, a week on Cape Cod last year.... It's great sharing a cigar with my buddies; it's even better with my sons.

quote:

Originally posted by tgherpst:
well i think it is Gino here that is making the choice.

To clarify, I would categorize this as a choice a parent shouldn't make for his child. It's a personal decision, one that should be made by an informed adult for himself. Just my opinion, of course.

quote:

Originally posted by jmunro:
I think the last thing anyone should do for their children is take a strict prohibitive stance on alcohol and tobacco... Looks like the great Catholic church in their infinite wisdom and preaching abstinence has worked perfectly.

Unfortunately, Americans hate educating their young, and thus we reap the benefits of the least educated population in the "developed" world.

That is the best thing I have ever heard from anyone on this board. You took the words right out of my mouth.

On my 16th birthday dad gave me a cuban Montecristo No 2

Parental consent for a sixteen year old to smoke is an extremely bad decision in my opinion. Just sends the wrong message, ie, that anything is ok. Not to mention that we are supposed to be smarter than they are, kind of the idea of parenting.

I have a son and two daughters who are still young. They ask me about cigars every now and then and I answer them as best I can. They have never asked to smoke one and I'm sure the time is a bit off when they do. I ask this to everyone here: How many bums do you see on this cigar board? I see many intelligent, hardworking, sincere people who have a great head on their shoulders. with this said how or why does anyone think that by having an hour or two speaking and listening to their son/ daughter going to hurt them? Everyone here is probably a bit stressed out with work and life. Why not sit back, relax and spend time with your kids! I have many friends who enjoy cigars and each is hardworking and earns a very good living, coincidence?

I see it like this he can either smoke them with you in a controled environment, or he can go some where he shouldn't been smoking more then a cigar with his father. I don't see a problem with it such event is being supervised by his father. JMO

Well we also do not know Gino's son. Apparently he thinks his son is mature enough to handle it. Just because he isn't 18 doesn't make a difference. That would be to say that Canadians are dumber and develop slower than Americans, since they can't smoke until their 19. Or that Germans are smarter, more mature, and develop faster than Americans, since Germans can drink beer and wine at 16 and hard liquor at 18.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: jms2788,

I drank my first beer with my dad at about 15-16, and we would have one every now and then during special occasions while I lived in his house. That exposure kept me from experimenting with alcohol outside of the house. I didn't drink in high school because if I really had a hankering for a beer my dad and I would have one together over a ball game or something.

Same thing with firearms or any other interest you have that your children can't have on their own. I let my 11 yr old drive a few vehicles I have off road. I'd never through him the keys and have him run to the store, but teach him under controlled environments a little at the time.

It will be fine with me if my boys don't smoke cigars, enjoy fine wine, single malts, beer, or whatever but if they do I hope I can be there to teach them about moderation and the finer points.

My only question would be what would be the intro cigar that you would use? I would think one the RYJ reserve lines would be tame enough.

Funny how cigars can teach moderation all by themselves too. You don't have to push the envelope too hard like you do with alcohol or drugs to have immediate negative consequences.

I have a niece who is seven years old. She lives a pretty sheltered life. I mean, at seven all she's pretty much learned is how to ride a bike. So I thought I'd introduce her to cigars.

It was great. Sitting in the cigar bar with your seven year old niece, teaching her how to clip a cigar, how to light it, what flavors to look for. She got sick a little bit, but that might have been from the scotch.

Afterwards, she gave me a hug. "Thank you, uncle," she said.

And I knew she meant it.

Tough call. People who grow up around cigars often get an early start--to hear it from some of the big cigar families, many start much earlier than 16. I find it impossible to justify letting someone this age get behind the wheel of a car, then forbidding the occasional cigar. Better that he should learn an appreciation of fine cigars from his father than lurk around convenience stores sneaking peach White Owls.

This is a tradition worth responsibly passing down. And it is encouraging that he thinks enough of you that he asked you to give him his initiation in cigar smoking.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: pintoirish,