The great Rabbi of a big city is a golf addict. He likes nothing like playing golf on a warm sunny afternoon. Unfortunately, on shabbat, he has to refrain himself. This is a big dilemma for his soul : the temp- tation to play golf, and the consciousness of doing wrong if he tries to do it on shabbat.

On a summer saturday afternoon, his soul is in dire straits : he was never so tempted of playing golf. The sky is blue, the grass is green, his clubs look at him with sardonic eyes (metaphor :-)) ... Finally, with great self-reproach and bad consciousness, he yields to temptation. He puts a fake beard on, sun glasses, and goes to the tee.

As he does this, the Lord is in the sky, looking at him very angrily. The first Angel is at the Lord's side, protesting : "Lord, look at this great Rabbi who goes playing golf on shabbat ! This is shameful ! This is a disgrace ! This is a scandal ! You MUST do something !". God, in cold rage, answers : "Oh, don't worry, you bet I will do something." And on they look on earth ...

After a while, the Rabbi is about to shoot the first ball. He raises his club, and .... five hundred meters away, sends DIRECTLY THE BALL INTO THE HOLE !

The first Angel, astonished, looks at God : "What ... what are you doing ? This is the great Rabbi, playing golf on shabbat, which is a terrible sin, and you let him make the best shoot he ever did ... ?!?" To which the Lord answers : "Yes ... and to whom will he be telling it, eh ?"

Same rabbi enters a church and goes straight for the confessional... Father enters, and the rabbi begins, "forgive me, for I have sinned..." he goes on and on about a liscivious relationship with a woman half his age, with all the where's, when's, and how's.

Father is a bit confused, and asks why on earth this rabbi of one faith would want to tell his sins to someone of another faith?

The rabbi responds..."you kiddin'? I'm telling EVERYBODY!!"

One day, Moses, Jesus and another old man are playing at the local executive course. They come upon a par-3 with a water hazard in front. Jesus is first, he swings, but his ball goes right for the water.

Miraculously, the ball just sort of walks on top of the water, rolls onto the green, 12 inches from the cup! Amazing.

Moses is next. He swings with all his might, robes, beard and all, and the ball also goes right for the water. Miraculously, the water parts, the ball hits firmly, bounces forward, rolls SIX INCHES from the cup! Amazing.

Next...the old man. He swings with all his might and the ball just trickles forth, not even reaching the water. While the ball is rolling, a field mouse pops its head out of a hole, takes the ball in its mouth, and starts running away! Well, out of the tree, an eagle eying all of this swoops down and nabs the mouse, and starts to fly away. Out of a crystal clear blue sky, a bolt of lightning strikes the eagle who lets go of the mouse...as the mouse hits the ground, the ball pops out of its mouth, bounces, and rolls right into the cup!

Jesus just shakes his head...and says, "Dad...will you quit showing off and just play the GAME!?!"