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Guy Fieri
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Restaurant Review: Guy’s American Kitchen & Bar in Times Square



I like Guy Fieri, but damn, he gets CRUSHED!

A few snippets:

Hey, did you try that blue drink, the one that glows like nuclear waste? The watermelon margarita? Any idea why it tastes like some combination of radiator fluid and formaldehyde?

and...

How did nachos, one of the hardest dishes in the American canon to mess up, turn out so deeply unlovable? Why augment tortilla chips with fried lasagna noodles that taste like nothing except oil? Why not bury those chips under a properly hot and filling layer of melted cheese and jalapeños instead of dribbling them with thin needles of pepperoni and cold gray clots of ground turkey?

and...

When you hung that sign by the entrance that says, WELCOME TO FLAVOR TOWN!, were you just messing with our heads? Does this make it sound as if everything at Guy’s American Kitchen & Bar is inedible? I didn’t say that, did I?

and...

What accounts for the vast difference between the Donkey Sauce recipe you’ve published and the Donkey Sauce in your restaurant? Why has the hearty, rustic appeal of roasted-garlic mayonnaise been replaced by something that tastes like Miracle Whip with minced raw garlic? And when we hear the words Donkey Sauce, which part of the donkey are we supposed to think about?

finally...

Why did the toasted marshmallow taste like fish? Did you finish that blue drink?

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Mr. Magicoa,
 
Posts: 1352 | Registered: March 12, 2012Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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it was a rather unprofessional review. I've heard the restaurant is not all that great, and certainly not by NYC standards; that said, the article sounded like a letter from spurned girlfriend than a restaurant review. Way too much venom to be taken as an objective opinion
 
Posts: 252 | Registered: September 07, 2010Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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I tend to agree with with you as I've never read anything like it. I mean, if the restaurant was THIS bad, why even review it? Why not review KFC and Pizza Hut while you're at it?

Plus, I heard Guy was giving a large portion of his take from the restaurant to the Red Cross during the Hurricane aftermath.
 
Posts: 1352 | Registered: March 12, 2012Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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quote:
Originally posted by Mr. Magicoa:
Why not review KFC and Pizza Hut while you're at it?

Sacrilege! Two of my favorite guilty pleasures Wink
 
Posts: 2795 | Location: New England | Registered: August 03, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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It's Guy's name putting butts in the seats, not the food. However, this doesn't surprise me. From what I have seen of him on TV, he seems more like a TV personality than a chef.


Carthago delenda est
 
Posts: 1473 | Location: Rhode Island | Registered: August 08, 2011Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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quote:
Originally posted by mudville9:
It's Guy's name putting butts in the seats, not the food. However, this doesn't surprise me. From what I have seen of him on TV, he seems more like a TV personality than a chef.

according to anthony bourdain, most tv chefs cant actually cook.


Mark my word, if and when these preachers get control of the [Republican] party, and they're sure trying to do so, it's going to be a terrible damn problem. Frankly, these people frighten me. Politics and governing demand compromise. But these Christians believe they are acting in the name of God, so they can't and won't compromise. I know, I've tried to deal with them.
-Barry Goldwater
 
Posts: 8129 | Location: Maryland | Registered: September 09, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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That was just the latest in a string of bad reviews.

However, it's a Times Square restaurant. It's not intended to be a culinary showplace, it's so idiots from flyover states can feel fancy while eating chicken fingers and waffle fries and waiting for their matinee to start. It serves its purpose probably just as well as the Olive Garden ( *shudders while typing*).
 
Posts: 4435 | Registered: November 09, 2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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Seen this guy (no pun intended) a few times with his family at a couple of local restaurants. He's been pretty cool/personable the times we've seen him.

On a different note, the "Santa Maria tri-tip" roasts with his signature on them are very good (courtesy of Costco), while my experience with the "Rosemary pepper" roasts with his signature from the same source have reminded me that hooves, snouts & leather boots/jackets are technically, 100% "beef".

Smile


£
 
Posts: 1794 | Location: San Francisco CA | Registered: June 04, 2002Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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